Bovine Farts

Despite what Donald Trump says, climate change is real, and it’s upon us.

One species that stand culpable for the threat of our extinction, are the cows.

Or more exclusively, their grassy bovine butts.

You see, cows produce a lot of methane gas. Pungently scented, methane is also an incredibly powerful greenhouse gas.

Methane fumes are puffing in from the pastures at an accelerated rate- If we compare it to carbon dioxide, which is chugged out by our four legged friends of the metropolis (the cars), methane traps thirty times more heat in our atmosphere.

We are being dutch-ovened by the livestock, and something needs to be done about it.

That is why one group of researchers from the California Dairy Research Programme have been blessed with the task of studying cow gas, and they’ve been given a quarter of a million dollars to do so.

It’s a noble job, and perhaps the future of mankind depends on it.

Nevertheless, the task of prevent a cow from passing wind is somewhat problematic; there are too many cows, and they are tooting too much.

Here’s hoping that our California researchers can figure out some sort of cow-talytic converter to save our furry friends.

Well, moo-ving on.